When you see your friends or family members go through a pregnancy, you think “how nice”, maybe even “lucky her”. The last thing you probably think about is the stress and planning that they go through until, well, you are there.  Yes, there are planners who think of it all in advance, but even they have surprises along the way.

As your delivery date approaches, you may suddenly realize that you actually do not know how to care for a baby, have never given a bath to a newborn, or you are clueless about breastfeeding. These types of thoughts may be overwhelming, but are expected. Before you allow yourself to freak out (which is allowed, but not always necessary or beneficial…) you should know – you are not alone!

Lets start with the fact that everyone who chooses to have a baby has to learn how to care for their child.  It has been done for generations (how else would we be here?…) by new parents around the world. While parenting comes from experience, there are plenty of resources to help you feel prepared for parenthood!

New parents often ask: how do you get over the anxiety and get the hang of caring of a baby that isn’t even here yet? That’s a great question! First, you can (and should) take advantage of parenting classes offered by your hospital, such as baby basics, infant CPR, breastfeeding, etc.

Another great resource is your friends and family for help and advice. Other Moms have experienced the same feelings and questions you are facing now. While some parents are timid about sharing their newborn experiences, most feel obliged to giving tips and ideas as they too were once in your shoes.

You can also find reading material on caring for a newborn online or in print (there are some really good books that can guide you through more than just the first year!).  Many have found various blogs to be useful and honest, and provide the opportunity for parents to connect and relate to other parents around the world.

When your baby arrives, ask for help and accept any help offered to you! And always remember, you are not alone! Parenting can seem intimidating and requires a huge amount of responsibility, however the more you read and talk about it, the better you will feel about becoming a parent!

Science already has the technology to test for the sex of an embryo as early as eight cell developments (roughly around day 3, also known as the cleavage stage). This test can be done through a procedure called In Vitro Fertilization (IVF), in which egg cells are fertilized by sperm outside the womb.

Preimplantation genetic diagnosis (PGD) was originally developed for reasons unrelated to embryo sex selection. The initial cause for developing various types of embryo tests was to detect genetic diseases that a baby could inherit from its birth parents before pregnancy.  Couples or individuals who test positive for serious genetic disorders such as cystic fibrosis or other genetic diseases can investigate whether their child will share the same condition through these embryonic tests and determine if pregnancy is the right decision for them.

While the opportunity of sex selection is a result of PGD, it is rarely used for this purpose. It is also a very costly treatment (a single round of PGD can cost nearly $20,000). The procedure is invasive and can be painful; and unless needed for reasons other than infertility or known genetic defects, it can be an expensive investment.

If you’re determined to choose the sex of your unborn baby, you’ll have to meet strict eligibility requirements. Some clinics that perform the procedure only accept married couples that already have at least one child of the sex opposite to the one they’re trying for.  Other clinics have age limits or require you to take hormone tests to prove you’re not approaching menopause.

And of course there is a moral debate surrounding the idea of embryonic testing.  Some say that PGD helps parents make educated decisions about pregnancy and assist with planning for their future.  Others argue that it should be left to nature to navigate the proper balance in the world.  After all, we are only human…

A full term pregnancy lasts anywhere between 37 and 42 weeks (counted from the first day of the last menstrual period). Contractions starting on or after the 37^th week of a healthy pregnancy are normal and expected and will lead you to the delivery room.  It is contraction or dilation (opening of the cervix) before the 37^th week that may lead to preterm labor and/or premature birth.

The danger in premature birth is that the baby may not be fully developed to live outside the womb. Premature babies (also called preemies) are at high risk to develop complications, which in some cases can result in death. The risk of complications increases the earlier the baby is born. After a preterm birth, the preemies are cared for in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) until they are of full term, have reached the minimum weight and are out of harm’s way.

It is hard to predict preterm labor or birth, especially with first pregnancy. There is a range of factors that can affect preterm labor, including certain genital tract infections, placenta issues, excessively large uterus, too much amniotic fluid and certain chronic maternal illnesses. Speak to your doctor about preterm labor or birth if you experience any of the above issues or are concerned about it and want to know more.

In the United States, Canada, and a growing list of other countries, a baby shower is an event to celebrate the expected birth of a new baby by presenting gifts to the parents to be at a party. Traditionally, a baby shower is held only for the mother-to-be, and is attended by women only. This is because the original intent was for women to share wisdom and lessons on the art of becoming a mother.

Traditionally, baby showers were given only for the family’s first child, but over time, it has become more common to hold them for subsequent children as well.

Deciding whether you should have a baby shower is personal as well as cultural. Some cultures celebrate the birth of a child only after the delivery for various reasons such as religion, belief and/or superstition. Others may choose not to have a shower due to a previous miscarriage or other unfortunate experiences.

Many moms to be and their family and friends see the baby shower as a celebration of the new life coming to the world. It is also a great excuse to get everyone together…

Whatever you choose for yourself and your baby, weather you have a shower or not, if it is a small gathering or an elaborate event, get someone to either throw it for you (you have enough on your plate with your baby coming) or help!

Our baby girl is a year old! What a milestone!

It is fascinating how the perception of time changes when you become a parent. The pregnancy, although ‘only’ nine months long, seemed like the longest period of time. Time stubbornly slowed down with the excitement to meet our baby. But looking back now, a year after the delivery – the fears of the unknown, getting ready for motherhood, the anticipation and all the WAITTING – they are almost like a faint memory.

So much has changed in the past year. Our little baby grew to be a happy, curious, adventurous and very energetic toddler. The transformation from an infant a baby girl went hand in hand with our own development from a couple who happens to have a baby, to parents.

It was amazing to watch her development. From a helpless infant who needed our help with any and every little thing, she has grown to be an independent little lady (ok, tom boy may be more like it..). It is so hard to imagine these changes that you just have to be present to experience them, and every moment (first real smile, the first time she turned, crawled, walked, first tooth, first sounds, first anything) is just so precious.

Happy First Birthday!

Planning on getting pregnant? Keep in mind; it can take longer than you think. Yes, there are couples who are very fertile and will conceive on the first try, or get pregnant after having sex only once, but the chances of this scenario are slimmer than you may think.

We are taught to never have unprotected sex, in order to avoid an unwanted pregnancy. Although, it is a good way to avoid an unwanted pregnancy as well as sexually transmitted diseases, it leads to misconceptions of the actual chances of conception. Here are some facts you may want to take into consideration while planning to conceive. Don’t be discouraged, but have patience.

After getting off birth control pills it can (but doesn’t have to) take a little while before you become pregnant. Some healthcare providers say that your body needs to ‘clean itself out off the hormones’, while others say there is no truth to this statement. Regardless of which of the two you choose to believe, be aware that you may not conceive the month following termination of your birth control pills. This is not an indication for a problem. Take your time and continue trying.

Stress is a major factor in delayed conception. When trying to get pregnant, try to avoid stress in your life. If you exercise, continue to do so, or find another way to relax. Stressing over the coveted pregnancy that does not happen can delay it as well. Plan a romantic getaway for two and try to ‘let it happen’ rather than force it on.

To get pregnant faster, you certainly need to have frequent sex, preferably before you ovulate (after which it is too late for this month. But no worries, there is always next month). Sperm can live for three to five days in your body, which means you can have sex even several days before you ovulate and still conceive.

To increase your chances of conception, start having sex every day (or every other day) on the 10^th day of your cycle (start counting on the first day of your period). Try to keep stress levels in your life low, especially does related to whether or not you become pregnant, but also at work, home, etc. Eat healthy and exercise and do not get discouraged if it takes longer than desired. Most couples will achieve a pregnancy within the first 12-18 months. After 12 months, you can speak to your ob/gyn about other options for you and your partner.

Best of luck! And stay positive. Attitude does make a difference!

Breastfeeding is the natural way to feed babies. Breast milk is designed to provide a baby with all its needs right from the start. Right after birth and for the first 3-5 days after, your body produces colostrum, which is a thick yellow fluid, rich in protein, low in fat, and high in carbohydrate, and antibodies to help keep your baby healthy. Within the first week after birth, your milk will come in, replacing the colostrum, and it will change in content with your baby’s growth.

Creating a solid basis for breastfeeding is important for a good mutual nursing experience for both you and your baby. The key to breastfeeding successfully is a proper latch. When there is a good latch, the baby will get the milk or colostrums needed to grow and get stronger, while simultaneously stimulating your body to produce more milk.

A poor latch can lead to a malnourished and frustrated baby, which in turn may discourage Mom. More so, a poor latch can cause the Mother nipple pain – if not cracking and bleeding. If the baby does not get milk, you may experience engorgement, which is painful and will make it even harder for your baby to breastfeed.

A good nursing position is important in achieving a proper latch. You can start practicing right in the delivery room, minutes after your baby was born. Skin to skin contact is important, and tummy to tummy positioning with easy access to the breast is crucial. If you have doubt or any questions, you should ask to see a lactation consultant in the hospital.

Where there is demand, there is milk. If you wait for your milk to come in before you start breastfeeding, you will miss out on the breastfeeding experience. Almost all mothers can breastfeed, but you have to stimulate your body to do so. All you need to do is allow your baby to do what is natural, for your body to get the signal. It is that simple.

You may also like:

• Breastfeeding 101- Use it or lose it.
• Breastfeeding in Public

You’ve had your first baby, and you and your partner have decided you are ready to expand the family once again. While that is an exciting decision, you now have a little one to factor into these types of decision makings.

Yes, it is YOUR decision, but taking a minute to consider how it will affect your little one may go a long way. That is not to say that you should go and consult your first born what he/she thinks of the possibility of becoming an older brother/sister, but think of how he/she will react to such news (based on personality), will he take well to sharing your attention, how will he/she treat the new baby, what will be a good time to share the news, etc.

Is your little one ready to be an older brother or sister? Is there really a way to know? Well, not really. Only time will tell. What you CAN do is prepare the whole family for this new adventure.

This can be a wonderful and exciting time for all of you. After you tell your little one the news, you can go to a prenatal visit together so your firstborn can ‘meet’ the new baby. You can practice holding a doll together, take sibling preparation class at the hospital, and talk about ‘your little brother/sister’ and how things may change, what they can do together, etc.

You may need to help your firstborn to adjust to the newly expanded family. If you have family or friends near by, use them for help. Continue whatever routine your eldest already have (daycare for example), and make him/her feel a part of the joy your family is graced with.

Breastfeeding is a very personal and intimate activity between you and your baby, and deciding to wean your baby, and when can (but doesn’t have to) be a bit tricky, if not painful process for the both of you.

It is really up to you to decide when is a good time to quit ‘the boob’, or when you have just had enough (which is a normal  – do not beat yourself up. You have given your baby a lot already just giving him colostrum). There is no right or wrong (or magic) age for weaning, so go with your gut feeling. Of course you want to make sure your baby has supplements (formula or solids, depending on both age and weather he has teethes). You can try those before or during the time you choose to wean your baby.

It is recommended to wean gradually, and not just stop breastfeeding altogether one day. The later way will certainly be more painful for the both of you. It can potentially be traumatic for your baby, and you will be facing engorgement and may risk getting mastitis (a breast infection). Instead, start by skipping a feeding, and replace it with formula or solids. This way your body will learn to gradually produce less milk.

Don’t be discouraged if your baby denies other foods, but try other options. For example, if your baby refuses formula, try warming it up a bit. Breast milk is at body temperature, formula refusal may be due to too many changes (both in taste, smell and temperature).

Some babies wean themselves when they are ready (even if you may not be), which saves you from having to do it for them. But if you are ready before your baby is, start slowly and together you will reach the goal!

You may also like:

• Weaning – It Is Your Choice
• Your Boobies, my boobies

While pregnancy is not an illness, it may have various affects on your body. Not every women experience pregnancy related problems, and you may very well be lucky enough for these problems to never arise. Like with your delivery, you want to plan for the best, but be open to whatever comes your way, for you do not control it (or most of it) and more reassuringly, whatever problem(s) you are experiencing, it will be gone with the arrival of your baby or shortly after.

Even the most fit women may experience common pregnancy problems. A healthy lifestyle may help prevent some issues, but genealogy is always a factor as well as the nature of each individual pregnancy (even in the same women). Even though not avoidable, many of the common pregnancy problems can be treated for relief.

Nausea, also known as morning sickness, doesn’t always occur in the morning. Some women experience nausea or vomiting during different times of the day or its entirety. You can take comfort on the fact that this usually disappears after 14-16 weeks.

Fatigue is common in the first and third trimesters. During the first trimester your body is undergoing many changes, which affect your energy levels. Fatigue during the third trimester is due to the baby’s size and weight, which are grater now and harder to carry.

Mood changes are common during pregnancy. This is cause both by hormone level changes and the stress that may come with the realization of the responsibility that comes with parenthood. If you are concerned, talk to your healthcare provider.

Constipation is caused by a hormone that relaxes the intestinal muscle. To avoid constipation drink plenty of fluids and eat foods that are rich with fiber.

Gas is on the embarrassing side of pregnancy problems. It is caused by much higher levels of progesterone, a hormone that relaxes smooth muscle tissue throughout your body, including your gastrointestinal tract. This relaxation slows down your digestive processes, which can lead to gas, bloating, burping, and flatulence and generally create miserable sensations in your gut, especially after a big meal. To overcome it, eat smaller, more frequent meals. You can also try Simethicon..

Heartburn is caused by the hormone progesterone that is produced by the placenta. It relaxes the valve that separates the esophagus from the stomach, allowing gastric acids to seep back up, which causes a burning sensation. To prevent heartburn, avoid carbonated drinks, chocolate, caffeine and acidic foods. Speak to your doctor to see what medication you can take for it if you experience chronic heartburn.

Hemorrhoids are painful, swollen veins in the lower portion of the
rectum or anus; they are usually a result of constipation (which is common during pregnancy). They can be treated with a cream. Consult your healthcare provider for a cream or other solution.

Oedema is swelling in your ankles, feet and hands. This happens due to fluid retention and more blood in your body during pregnancy. Try to rest with your feet elevated, and know that it will disappear after your delivery.

These are some of pregnancy’s common problems; most of which are treatable or will disappear shortly after the delivery. Other problems include headaches, diarrhea, vaginal discharge and Sciatica pain. You may or may not suffer from any pregnancy problems. If you are one of the lucky ones, enjoy your problem free pregnancy while it lasts.  For the rest of you, take care of the problems that do show up to avoid discomfort. And remember, it is only temporary.