Expanding your family, whether you already have children or you are working on your first, is a life-changing experience. The decision is usually a mutual one (unless the pregnancy was a surprise to you both), and can bring about joy, but may also cause stress, anxiety, confusion and other feelings.

It is normal to be emotional about a change of this magnitude in your life. After all, the lifestyle you have known up until this point is about to be drastically altered.

If your family is expanding from two to three or more, you may be worried about the unknown, such as basic baby care for multiples, or parenting styles accustomed to each child. Parenting classes, usually offered by your hospital, can help prepare you for your new role as a parent by covering some of the basics.

If you worry about making mistakes, rest assure, you WILL make them, so there’s really no need to give it too much thought. Do your best and use your judgment, and remember you can always ask for help or advice from other parents or professionals.

Planning to expand your family the second or third (or more) time around has its own joys and challenges. You consider age differences and what the perfect spacing is for your family, but remember that most women don’t conceive on the demand and getting pregnant usually takes several tries.

What ever the age differences may be, there are different challenges to overcome and joys to be shared when raising siblings. Research sibling preparation classes for your kids when expecting a new baby, or talk to them; get them ready for the new addition to the family.

Raising children is the most demanding and the most joyous job you will experience and once you have them, you are in for the long run. Embrace your new title as a parent with all that comes with it. Remember to make time for romance and don’t forget how it all started.

For some people is it not even a question – they have always wanted kids or are at the point in their life were they are ready and want to take on this life change. Others may be going back and forth, not sure if it is time or if it is even something they want. Then there are those who are content with their life as it is and choose not to make any changes.

Regardless of your choice, make the most of it and enjoy it. Having kids right away, waiting or choosing not to have kids, are all valid decisions and are yours to make. So don’t let others make it for you.

Parenthood is both one of life’s most joyous times and its most demanding. It is hard to imagine the essence of parenthood before you have kids.

Being a parent is a much harder job than you can foresee, no matter how ready you are. The constant demand for your time and energy, the little time to recharge, the lack of training, the financial strain, and emotional involvement are all part of the difficulties of being a parent. With so much stress involved – there are the mistakes you will make (and you will), that will affect the people you love most.

No mater how much you have prepared for it, or what your plans are, they will change with the arrival your baby. It is impossible to anticipate how you will react to this tremendous responsibility, or how you will do with little to no sleep. The dynamics between you and your partner will change (sometimes temporarily, other times for good), because of the new roles you will both assume. Life in its entirety will never be the same after you become a parent.

At the same time, there is nothing that compares to the love you will receive from your child, their first smile, all the hugs, laughing together – all these and more are the heart and sole of being a parent. The rest you will have to find out on your own if you are ready to take on this life changing adventure.

Remember, there is no turning back!

Bringing your newborn home is an amazing experience. You have conquered the challenges of pregnancy, experienced the climax of childbirth, and are now stronger than ever in your relationship (hopefully). The birth of your baby marks the start of your lives as parents.

Achieving the goal of parenthood together can certainly bring a couple closer. However, at the same time the difficulties and challenges you face as a new parents can bring about conflict about parenting methods and approaches. Believe it or not, but bringing home a baby can ignite feelings of jealousy, or the loss of ‘first place’ in the eyes of your partner. Fatigue and lack of time to devote to each other can also cause frustration. Sooner or later you may realize that parenthood, as amazing as it may be, is affecting your relationship with your partner in ways you did not anticipate.

What can you do? After all, you are exhausted, your baby is completely dependant on you, and you cannot find a minute to devote to anything else. For starters, you can acknowledge the problem. Talk to your partner about both your feelings and see what your expectations from each other are.

Making time for each other is crucial. If you have relatives or friends who are willing or offering to help / babysit take them up on it! A night out, even an hour or two, would do wanders to your perspective and your relationship.

Divide up your responsibilities so that when baby is asleep, you can take the time to cuddle in front of the TV or have a candle light dinner, rather than running around trying to finish up all your chores.

Lower your standards. Although hard to do for some, you will notice that prioritizing and adjusting your standards for what is considered clean, tidy, etc. can free up some of your time and allow you the time you are missing with your spouse, as well as time to relax and recharge.

With time, your baby will become more independent and you will have more time and opportunity to nurture your relationship with your partner. In the mean time, make a few adjustments to make time for your marital relationship. It is important for you and your child that your relationship with your spouse is a strong and happy one.

Some may assume that there is no waiting period needed before resuming sexual activity after a cesarean section because there was no vaginal delivery. Although that may seem logical, it is not the case. The usual waiting period before resuming sex is six weeks after the birth (vaginal or cesarean), or after your postpartum doctor/midwife visit and they have given you the ok.

After any delivery, vaginal or cesarean there is vaginal bleeding from the uterus, which is healing and cleaning itself out from the pregnancy. At your postpartum visit your doctor will check your incisions to see how those are healing, and see if the bleeding has stopped. This is usually when you will get the green light to resume intercourse.

While most of the post partum issues resolve within 6 weeks or so, you may be dealing with still tender incision area. In that case try positions that will not introduce any direct contact with the incision area.

Another thing to take into account is that most new moms, and especially breastfeeding moms (usually for as long as they breastfeed), will experience excessive dryness and may need the help of lubrication gels or creams.

When you do decide to get back in the game, give yourself a break and ask your partner to do the same by taking things slowly. Things may not feel the same at the beginning, and muscles will be or feel stiffer than normal, or more tender. Start slow, and listen to your body. Talk to your partner and share your feeling / pain / etc. Things will return to normal eventually, but forcing things will not speed up your body’s healing process.

Six to eight weeks after you give birth, you will be ready to have sex again. It may take more or less time, depending on your delivery experience, your healing process, bleeding (usually lasts 4-6 weeks after delivery), fatigue from adjusting to your baby’s schedule and the new lifestyle as a Mom.

If you worry about pain during intercourse, you are not alone. Your vagina may be dry (especially if you are breastfeeding) and tender, which can be resolved with the use of lubricants. Start slowly and share your feelings with your partner. Different positions may work better, so try different ones if in pain till you find the right fit. If intercourse is still painful, consult your OB/GYN for other possibilities.

It is normal for your sexual desire to decline after childbirth. Fear of painful intercourse, fatigue from care for a newborn and hormone levels changing, even baby blues, can result in decreased desire to have sex. Share these feelings and concerns with your partner and find other ways maintain intimacy till you are ready to resume sex.

When you are ready to resume sexual activity, make sure you wait to have intercourse after your postpartum checkup. Realize that child birth does affect your sex life. Think for a moment of the delivery process. Remember that? It caused some trauma to your body, and it takes time for it to get back to its normal state. Thing will not be exactly as they were, but close to it. Decreased muscle tone in the vagina may reduce pleasurable friction during sex. Kegel exercises will help restore the pelvic floor muscles.

Whatever issues you may experience in your sex life after giving birth, give yourself time. Things will get better when your body will heal and you will be adjusted to motherhood and your new schedule and lifestyle.

In the beginning, there were two…

Chronologically, your partner was there first. He was in the center of your attention, your other half, the one you chose to live your life with. Together you created a family. You conceived, the two of you were excited throughout the pregnancy and waited to meet your baby, who will expand your description from a couple to a family.

Then your baby was born – small, new to the world and helpless without you. The three of you became a family, and at the same time, you lost your life as a couple. Or did you? Many couples experience a dramatic change in their relationship after their first baby is born. For most, the changes result in nothing more than period of adjustment; others may experience permanent and dramatic changes.

It is common to experience changes in the dynamics of your family when a baby is added to the picture. With all the excitement of bringing home a new baby, adjusting to the baby’s schedule, which is now your new schedule, lack of sleep and hormones, etc. – it can be overwhelming and your relationship and intimacy with your partner will suffer, or at least take the back seat for a while.

The good news is that this can be temporary. It is all up to the two of you. So who comes first for you? Your baby or your partner?

The answer is very personal. Different people have different priorities and needs. Your baby is helpless in its first year of life, and therefore will actually NEED more of your attention, care and love. Your husband/partner, while he can (potentially) take care of himself, still needs your love and affection even after your baby is born as well. Try and find the balance that works for you and your family. Feelings of neglect are not something you want in your newly expended household.